


the only thing you let hold you

by hadeswasonlyaman (riddlemebitch)



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Found Families, Friendship/Love, i love romcoms?, tags will be updated when i figure my shit out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-24 05:57:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13207434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddlemebitch/pseuds/hadeswasonlyaman
Summary: rey and ben meet at finn and poe's wedding, which he only begrudgingly attends at the request of his mother. after a particularly difficult encounter, they can't seem to avoid each other.





	the only thing you let hold you

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so, first off, what the fuck am I doing? I have very little plan going forward but I wanted to jump into a modern AU fic because writing in universe is hard and I'm a big baby. Somehow I ended up thinking mostly about my favourite romcoms and then... going from there. I don't really know what I'm doing but this isn't gonna get too heavy. Thanks 2 my One Friend for reading over my trash before I post it, you know who you are. Rating will go up when it becomes necessary.

Ben hadn’t wanted to attend Finn and Poe’s wedding in the first place. He had come up with plenty of reasons for his mother why his invite was more of a formal courtesy than genuine want for him to attend, but she wasn’t having it.  _ They don’t really want me there _ , he reasoned.  _ They just don’t wanna piss you off by not inviting me at all _ .  _ Please don’t put us all through this gruellingly awkward social interaction _ , he had pleaded. For all his arguments it had landed him in just the same position, begrudgingly doing what she had asked of him.

(It wasn’t that he just did whatever she told him to, of course, it was just that she was particularly pushy about him making an appearance and it was better to pick his battles with Leia.)

He and Poe were childhood friends once upon a time, though now they were more like bickering acquaintances, never quite getting along in regards to much. Finn used to work for him and so therefore Ben was probably also the likely reason he’d met Poe in the first place, with him coming around as his mother’s mouthpiece so god damn often. Those days had been rough and he’d been so stubborn, refusing to listen to reason, refusing to feel anything but his frustration and anger. 

Now that he thought about it, his now husband was most likely the reason Finn had quit his job as his assistant.

Ben was skulking in the corner, dressed more appropriately for a funeral than a wedding in his black dress shirt and slacks. He was at his table, in front of the little name card he had knocked over earlier in the night. He’d been sat with just about no one he knew. Well, besides for Hux, who had finally given up on small talk and apparently decided to leave soon after the lights went down and the dance floor filled with people. 

In his large hand rested his third glass of wine, mostly just there to occupy him as he watched the people in the dark room and tried not to grimace at everything around him.

Weddings were  _ happy _ occasions. 

Ben didn’t consider himself a particularly happy person, especially not in a way that made events like this appeal to him. Still, he could appreciate that it was beautiful, in sentimentality and decor, even if all the colour wasn’t him, it was definitely  _ very  _ them. Admiring the happiness of others wasn’t hard either, he’d watched his mother give a particularly impassioned toast and he’d spied her dancing in the crowd, even sharing a slow dance with Poe. He used to be bitter about their closeness, maybe sometimes he still was, but he could be glad she was having a good time.

His eyes scanned the dance floor once again, but he had no plans to move from his chair. Ben certainly couldn’t dance and he never made attempts, thinking it was best not to make himself and everyone around him uncomfortable. It wasn’t clear what he was looking for as he searched the room. Distraction, maybe. Excuse to leave, more likely. Returning to his drink, he resolved to give it at least another half hour before he retrieved his coat and got out of there. 

He didn’t look up again until someone sat down two seats from him that definitely hadn’t been sitting there earlier. Ben blinked and then frowned as he looked at her, trying to figure out why she looked familiar. She stared back at him, like she planned to say something but his staring had probably thrown her off.  _ Definitely _ thrown her of. He dropped his gaze, unsettled. 

“Not dancing?” She asked and the English accent had him frowning again, trying to trace her to some picture his mother had shown him, or maybe something on Facebook one of the few times he’d checked it in the last year or so.

“Not even if you paid me.” Came his response, his voice deep and unfortunately humourless, despite the joke. She gave him the smallest of smiles, it felt like pity.

“You’re Leia’s son, right? Ben?” The fact that she knew who he was made him feel rude for being so uncertain as to who she was.

He cleared his throat and nodded. “Mm hm.” 

“I’m Rey.” The greeting was kind to the point of throwing him off and his lack of people skills seemed to become embarrassingly apparent around those who were as beautiful as she was. Her hair was in bouncy curls, resting above her shoulders and she wore a blue-green dress with spaghetti straps that clung tightly to her at the bodice. Her smile was definitely the most dazzling part about her, the way her face seemed to light up as she held out her hand to him. From where he sat he was close enough to spy beads of sweat on her forehead, presumably from the heat of all the people on the dancefloor. 

He looked from her hand, back to her face and then took her hand a few beats too late, shaking it abruptly. “And how do you, uh, know the lovely couple?”

The sarcasm came on a little too strongly, more so than he’d intended it too and he winced, took a breath. Conversations were especially painful when he had no idea what preconceived notions she had about him, even more so when he had none about her and didn’t had the information to even form them.

“College. Well, Finn at least, we met freshman year after he’d accidentally gotten himself into some trouble with a fraternity. They were chasing him down the street, I happened to be generous and driving my piece of junk car... it’s a long story. And then, well, I met Poe through Finn.” Rey explained and he couldn’t help the urge to point out she had made a short explanation needlessly long. Instead he said nothing. It wasn’t clear how old she was, if she was still in college or if she had graduated like Finn had. 

“I see. He did seem to attract trouble at times.” 

“And you know them both, right?”

“Yes. I assume you ask because you already know.” 

“Finn’s old boss may have come up a few times in conversation.” She looked coy and he was embarrassed, recalling very clearly his inability to be the most kind and appreciative of bosses. It suddenly became apparent to him that attempting to get her to like him was probably a lost cause, if she’d heard about all of that. Not that he should care whether she liked him or not. 

“Right, well. Not sure why you’d want to meet him then.” Another sip of wine and suddenly he had no more. With annoyed breath, he placed the glass down and looked to her again as she replied. 

There was a frown on her face, his behaviour presumably getting to her, finally. “I figured if he came to the wedding maybe he wasn’t so awful.”

Ben pursed his lips, sat up straighter. “Only here because I was asked.”

Her eyes wouldn’t move from him so he refused to look at her. “Right.”

The conversation dried up as quickly as it had had began, Ben not able to give any more to it because really, maybe he just wanted her to leave so he’d stop looking like an idiot in front of her. He couldn’t help but regret the loss of that smile, though. It was etched into his brain, still threatening to charm him into giving one of his own. 

“Well, it was nice to meet you, Ben.” She was still trying and he just looked at her and then stood up, longing for another drink.

“I better be going.” Was his response as he stood up, not meeting her gaze and heading off towards the other end of the room.

His mother would have to be content with a goodbye text, because he wasn’t going to be able to spend another minute in that room, rattled by one conversation with one girl or more likely his inability to have it. 

-

Rey remained in her seat, staring after the infamous Ben Solo as he scurried off like a bug she’d shined a light on. She didn’t consider herself any sort of expert in social interaction, but she was fairly certain the guy was just as bad as Finn had made him out to be. He was standoffish and short with her, like he had  _ any _ reason to dislike her. He didn’t even know her!

It took her a moment, still reeling, to stop staring at the space he had just been before disappearing behind a door. She sat back against the chair, shoulders slumping as she looked around the room. 

Nothing could ruin this, not even that particularly awkward and uncomfortable encounter. 

The room felt filled up with love, a warmth that made her smile in spite of her annoyance. She wiped her forehead. Looking down at her now wet fingers she chuckled, took another breath and stood again, eager to get back to the dance floor and return to everyone. Her feet ached underneath her to be standing up again, but she stubbornly marched over to them anyway. There was a running pool going between their friends on how long Rey could keep her heels on and she wasn’t about to let any of them win it. 

Finn immediately took her waist as she returned, giving a knowing look as if he’d seen what she’d just been through. 

“I told you he wasn’t all that nice.” He said, holding her other hand out as he danced with her, then taking her hands in his and pushing them apart only to bring her forward again.

“Well I just wanted to check! He looked like a sulking kid with no friends, sitting at that table.” She frowned as they lifted their arms over their heads and Finn let one of her hands drop. Their dance moves came instinctively, a stupid routine they’d made up part way through college for when they went out that was known equally as well by Rose, Kaydel and Poe too. 

“You never trust my judgement. I promise you, I’m right about everything.” He assured, like he had plenty of times before.

Rey rolled her eyes as their hands reconnected. “Well, I believe you now, about this _one_ thing.”

Eventually Poe approached to cut in and Rey backed off easily, holding her hands up and dancing backwards until she bumped into Rose, who wrapped her arms around her and leaned her head against her shoulder. 

“Don’t you think this is  _ perfect _ ?” She sighed dreamily for what felt like the fiftieth time that day, which made the taller of the two chuckle. 

“Oh, absolutely.” She replied teasingly as she placed her arms over Rose’s and swayed with her, watching their best friends be disgustingly adorable and in love. Finn in his navy suit and Poe in grey, they danced together, mumbling to each other and grinning stupidly in between kisses. 

Rey didn’t really feel any particular way about weddings. They were to her as anything else was, a part of life, a celebration and an exhausting spectacle. She never quite had the magic of weddings indoctrinated into her as a child as maybe Rose did, never had the family occasions to get excited over or watched enough television to wish she was some pretty princess marrying a prince. It wasn't her schoolgirl fantasy, not when she was trying to focus on being practical. There were her parents to focus on remembering, there was always work to be done so she wouldn’t miss out on dinner. As she grew she went through the phase of becoming a headstrong tomboy, aggressively rejecting what she saw as feminine (love and marriage included) but the indifference regained dominance as she became an adult. 

Still, despite that, she wasn’t blind to how beautiful love was laid out in front of her in the form of wanting to be with someone for the rest of your life. She’d spent her day competing with the photographer, trying to get the best pictures, she’d stood behind her closest friend as she watched him exchange vows with the man he loved, her eyes welling up with tears she laughed away. Rey had even had a part in planning it all.

As she watched them sway, though, she couldn’t help but feel a twinge of loneliness sprout up, curling around her. 

It wasn’t that Rey had never been with anyone, she’d had a few fleeting things here and there. She very rarely let someone all the way in but she’d been given nights of comfort when it was recognised that she needed them, having spent much of her life wishing she wasn’t sleeping alone. In fact, there had even been a whole two weeks of Rey and Rose fooling around and edging close to something after they met, before they realised they were better as friends. After that she’d gotten so close with Finn that it had taken time for Rey to adjust to it all. These days all of that seemed a distant memory, only months into Finn’s relationship with Poe, the one they were all celebrating tonight. 

It wasn’t even really about romance, she knew that as she caught sight of Poe’s parents talking together quietly at a table, big smiles on their faces. Or one of the multiple times in the night a child had ran past her laughing, a parent yelling out after them. Finn understood her when she talked about her family, but he never had anything to say when she again made it clear she still had hope that one day they’d find her again. 

The wistful look could only last so long before they were interrupted, by not only Kaydel looking to do shots but also by Leia, apparently wanting to talk to her. She shooed her friends off and took the older woman’s hand, following as she led her towards the edge of the dancefloor. 

“You know, Poe’s been supposed to ask you all month,” She began, shaking her head and smiling softly as Rey couldn’t help but interrupt her. 

“Ask me what?” 

“He’s gone for two weeks on that damn honeymoon,” Which Leia had paid for, in part. She didn’t want everyone to know it, but Finn could very rarely keep secrets from her. “And I was told that you just quit that barista job...”

Rey made a face at that. Definitely  _ not _ her best experience working, she’d had her job at that cafe for months before she’d gotten fed up with rude customers and even worse management. “Yeah..”

“I just need someone to do some of the work he used to do for me, you know, making sure I don’t miss appearances, helping with little things, mostly. I’d only call you in when I need you.” The explanation was completely unnecessary, because Rey was already nodding eagerly. Poe had nothing but praise for working with Leia, always having a story to tell that left them in stitches or awe and after meeting her it had been difficult not to immediately idolise her. She could only fantasise about working for someone as wonderful as the woman in front of her, so much so that she almost missed her asking her to. “What do you say?”

“Are you kidding? Of course! I’ll definitely do it. I’m your girl.” She grinned, standing up tall and proud. 

They spoke a little longer, discussing things like the hourly rate of pay she’d be getting, how Leia would ask Poe to give her access to their calendar and her email. The conversation was brief but left Rey even more excited, meeting her friends in the middle of shots before getting back to the dancefloor. She'd be spending two weeks of her summer working with someone she admired and getting paid more than that barista job had ever given her, it seemed like some sort of miracle.

The rest of the night went on without a hitch and she only thought about Ben and their strange, stilted conversation once as she made her way towards the door, leading the way to send the happy couple off. 

Her heels had finally gotten the better of her and she unstrapped them at the ankles, slipping one off before Rose noticed and yelled disappointingly about losing the ridiculous bet. Finn and Poe turned to look, giving the same general expressions of disappointment about also losing and then went back to being distracted by one another. She couldn’t say she blamed them. 

“Oh, shut up.” Rey said to Rose, wanting desperately to sit down to soothe the ache in her feet, but the lack of heels definitely helped. “Who won, if not any of you?” 

Rose and Kaydel chuckled to themselves and the blonde was the one to reply. “Leia.” 

As if on cue, the older woman appeared, looking smug and collecting the money that Rose pulled out of her clutch. It was only a few crumpled up five dollar notes, but bragging rights were priceless. 

As she walked with them through the doors, everyone kissing and hugging them goodbye, it was then that Rey remembered the son of the woman she would be spending two weeks working for, the same son that Poe also seemed to endlessly complain about. The same son that apparently didn’t seem to like her much, for whatever reason. It didn’t have to matter yet, though. So, she set her shoulders and let it go, smiling and waving at her friends as they left.


End file.
